Today is 10 years since you became an Angel. Seems like yesterday. Some days I get a smell on my hands. It’s the same smell I encountered that day you passed and I held your hand until your last bresth. So I know your around.
love you Jimmy
Not a day goes by without you being on my mind…I miss you alot. You, Nanny, and Grandad have been on my mind these past couple days…I hope y'all are doin well. Tell them I said that I miss them and love them…that goes for you too(:
Although you may see tears comin down my eyes, don't worry they are happy memory tears…it just makes me wish I could have another day to spend with you
Love you lots
Victoria ❤
Hey baby, I can't believe it has been a year. It went by fast and yet slow at the same time. I still think about you every moment of every day. I would give anything just to have you back. I wish I didn't have to keep living without you, but I know I have to. It was so much better and easier when you were here. I hope your looking down over me watching me and helping me make the right decisions. The boys and I miss you terribly. They talk about you and ask questions about all the time. They have decided they want long hair like you had. So I am letting their hair grow. Anyway I miss you and love you so much. I will talk to you again soon.
Love Always,
Your loving and never forgetting wife
Danielle
Hey Jim as you know Mom has now joined you at your side. Please see after one another and help us through these rough and trying times. Mom is no longer in pain and you are now the guide for mom to help her through her initial steps as an angel. I have some comfort now knowing that my brother has someone next to him and my mother is pain free.
Love Ya Bro
take care of mom
and
always save me a seat
Hey sweetie, So this was my first Christmas without you. I must admit it would have been a lot more fun if you had been here. I was supposed to go to work tonight, but I got in an accident on the way. It scared the crap out of me and all I could think about was you and the boys. I am ok though which tells me you were there looking over me. I wanna thank you for that. I miss you so much it hurts. I wish you could come back to me. Anyway I just wanted to wish you a merry Christmas and tell you that I love you oh so very much and miss you badly. Keep watching over me kay cuz I really need you. Love you hun. Talk to you at New Years!
It was 1 year ago today we last spent time together. You came down for Christmas and we Played games all night long. That was the last time I laughed so hard that I cried. Now I just cry. Wow and we were playing life!!! That was only a game and it was fun and full of joy and laughter. I hope that you look down upon us now and guide us through our life and help bring back the joy and laughter i so much miss since you left our life.
Love Ya Bro
My Uncle James always knew how to put a smile on anyones face. My fondest memories of him will be those of our holidays spent together as a family. Every year playing our silly board games trying to make nanny laugh as hard as she could. Whether it was Cranium, Scategories, or the all - time favorite Pictionary. Those games haha I remember when we would play Pictionary, my dad and my uncle just knew what the other was thinking. James would draw a single line and my dad would guess sailboat and they got it right every time, it never failed no matter what the picture was. This past Christmas was particularly unforgettable. The whole night sitting here playing the game of life and just the things we were coming up with such as the beaners in a can or suing the lawyer (dee) because he was losing all his money LOL. Ah as I said never a dull moment. You will be greatly missed Uncle James ... beating up on Anthony, instigating fights between me and Tony, you and my dad cheating in Pictionary(I still think you had codes!), its hard to grasp the reality that you are no longer with us. Its so surreal everytime i look at your picture I cant believe youre gone. No family Thanksgiving or Christmas will ever be the same again. We miss you so much already and I'm dreading this next November and Dec. ... Remeber you will always be with us in our hearts and will never forget you. Love you Uncle James
My Brothers Final Bite
As with the first two bites, my brother understood the dangers involved dealing with his passion. On January 24th I received a text message from my wife asking me to call her ASAP. I was teaching in Albuquerque at the time and received a second text informing me that my brother had been bit by a snake. I called my brothers wife and she said my brother had died but was brought back through shocking his heart. I felt in my gut that this was not good. I called my wife and she was on her way to the hospital to be by my brother’s side. He was being flown by helicopter from Deming, New Mexico to El Paso, Texas. I immediately left my work driving the 4hr trip to try and get to my brother. My sister was in Phoenix when she was notified and she was on her way as well. When I reached the hospital and met up with my wife and sister, I saw my brother in ICU hooked on different machines.
My brother was swollen from the bite but not as bad as he was on the first bites and that was sort of a relief. My brother was on a ventilator to assist him with his breathing. He was initiating only 4 to 5 breaths on his own. While standing by my brother’s side, I held his hand and rubbed his forehead telling him to pull through this. I knew deep in my heart that as the doctor cautioned my brother on his last bite, he would probably not make it through this bite.
As the minutes and hours went by we began to have hope that he may battle through this, because he would move his thumb and his respiration would increase as we talked to him. Our hope was yet again shattered when the next morning the Doctor came in to assess my brothers condition in dong so she opened one of my brothers eye to check for a response and the only response was he began to posture. This is when the extremities of your body quickly withdraw inward in a curling motion. The Doctor informed us that she did not get any response from his eyes and that was not good. As the minutes and hours continued to pass us by my brother was still unresponsive to our voices and touch. Through the many tubes and IV’s my brother was in our eyes still with us.
A day came when the Doctors informed us that the state in which we now see our brother was the best he would get. The doctors gave him less than 1% chance of doing anything. My brother would never speak, open his eyes, laugh, talk, or move in anyway. The doctor said that due to him going into anaphylactic shock his brain was deprived of oxygen for a period of time. Technically the only part of my brother that was working on his own was the brain stem. My brother kidneys were failing, the liver was shutting down, and his breathing was not adequate on his own. The family was faced with a decision to leave my brother in his present state or to remove him from the life support.
The doctors said that he could be kept alive as long as he was on a ventilator. But what is life if he could not and would never see his own children, touch a guitar, hear the joys of the Holidays, taste a cold coke, smell the fresh air in the mountains. My brother had conveyed his wishes before he was silenced, that do not leave him as he was, let me go. The day came when we had to release the angel that was trapped. When all the artificial life support was removed, the rise and fall of his chest was no more. I held his hand and felt the strong pounding of his heart. As the heart rate decreased I squeezed his hand harder. Within minutes my brother had become my angel.
The Nurses and Doctors took care of my brother knowing that the end result was he would pass. Words can not express the extreme thoughtfulness and compassion from the nursing staff in the ICU. This was a feeling that touched our heart in more ways than we could ever express. The ICU staff made the situation easier, not to say that death can ever be easy, but from the comfort of the ICU staff we know they cared for my brother as well.
My brother was a very active person, his smile would light up a room and his humor could be felt for days. My brother had gone through many hard times in his short 37 years. We almost lost him twice when he was a child due to asthma. My brother lost everything he owned in a house fire. My brother lived life like he wanted. I admired his talents of painting, playing the guitar, his writing of songs and his way with words. I don’t think he ever knew how much my sister and I really looked up to him, our baby brother.
